red red wine makes me something something

2009-06-05T18:54:00.000-07:00

the coffee stirrer i'm holding has the words "you think too much" printed on it and i'm staring at those words, silently, across from the man who told me just five minutes before that he "[doesn't] like sex." i feel like crying. yet, it is amazing how fast you can get out of bed, get your clothes on and get a cup of coffee after hearing something like that. he's 30. he's japanese. he's

i teach, i learn

2009-01-13T21:47:00.000-08:00

i teach.it's what i do for money.i teach a right wing spiritualist cram school owner, three gay men, five young women and a host of high school students.each of them has taught me something about the Japanese people: the right wing spiritualist nut believes that the emperor is descended from god and that the Japanese people are "different" from the people everywhere else, the three lonely,

a new year, now with less regret...

2009-01-13T03:55:00.000-08:00

the year 2008 was, for me, a rather intense year; looking back neither 2006 nor 2007 were as intense... but maybe that's just time, dulling the TRUE impact of those years.i was poor for a good portion of the year, but my relative poverty was a result of my moving to Tokyo and, well, living a good life. i am sure that my family (read: mother) would say that I'd spent too much money on the

purg

2008-05-16T08:44:00.001-07:00

hate the hirarchy of cool that exists in club culture...those ephemeral lines that seperate guest list from the purgatory of the discount list and that list from the scum that...everyone else is. had a beer while waitimg for a friend..thus missing chance 1,2,3,4,5,6 and 78910 to get in and now ive gotta wait between the normals and the kids that talk about music while in line... it is...not

sayonara's and sitting still for 4 hours with no bathroom break

2008-03-11T16:55:00.000-07:00

the band is awful-the wind instruments rush to finish their parts and everyones either sharp or flat and the whole thing makes Auld Lang Syne sound like a Merry-go-round playing funeral durges... The gym is ringed with red and white striped paper, a japanese flag and a fujisawa flag and a school flag adorn the stage...flowers line the steps...and the teachers of the graduating students wear

2008-02-19T17:38:00.001-08:00

people still drink zima MEN drink zimaPEOPLE drink zima...maybe im just giving hnto hype but...isnt it against some sort of immutable code of masculinity for any man totouch it? ah... i am so american-i have such rigid, unnatural rules about what makes a man...im at some sort of techno event in fujisawa... we're high in the building, looking out on the beach and im alone, earlier than my other

saturday

2007-10-11T21:31:00.001-07:00

saturday morning was hard. up dancing till 2(a-trak was awful for he first ten minutes...then slowly he and the crowd warmed to eachother and it was good) and then trouble sleeping due to back pain and incline related sleeping issues...at lily allen now (when i wrote that) and people false started again... i think they just dont know what the acts look like and so stagehand after stagehand is

friday

2007-10-11T21:03:00.001-07:00

woke several times in the night...my neighbors are all happy drinking people...finally ventured forth at eight for juice and the bathroom...but there was a ten minute wait...i met kouji and sayakaback at the camp site and we left for the onsen. the showers at the camp are cold water only, frigid mountain water cold. the onsen is 500 yen and its a japanese tradition. it was my first time. it

I am NOW a contributor!

2007-07-28T05:54:00.000-07:00

I like how it says I am a contributor here yet I have not contributed anything. Well here is something I recently wrote. I'll try to contribute more...I guess.The Blind Leading the Blind I haven't ever really had to share a room with my brother. When I was younger I had bunk beds that my brother inherited from me at birth and, being the scaredy-cat kid that I was (just hearing the theme from

bff... whistle... bang

2007-07-26T06:00:00.001-07:00

there were fireworks too

dance party

2007-07-26T05:42:00.000-07:00

dan, i love you, but house music and house djs are fun...but rarely cool.but the "all night rave" is going well and im gonna sneak to the "live" tent and see ratatat again. made two friends and saw a few aquaintances...3000 yen on drinks and food so far.more to come

the shinkansen

2007-07-25T17:04:00.001-07:00

the shinkansen is unabashedly sexy... long, sleek of line... if i were a freudian sort this would be the train of my dreams.as it is, my being less into incest and more into the brain as the great bio a.c..., it is just groovy. hah. groovy.my train has two floors-i am on the first, lowered, floor. im alone now, my dreams of a sexy neighbor to make eyes at or a happy experienced couple to use for

packing...

2007-07-24T21:25:00.001-07:00

getting ready to go.i'm gonna keep you updated via my trusty cellphone... stay tuned.i leave tomorrow morning...

fujirock a mass of unexpected bills but...

2007-07-02T04:28:00.001-07:00

The idea of a 4 night, 3 day camping excursion on a ski resort in Japan, accompanied by the tunes of: Clap Your Hands Say Yeah, Justice, The Shins, Simian Mobile Disco, The Cure, The Beastie Boys, The Chemical Brothers, !!!, Lily Allen, Peter Bjorn and John, A-trak, Chromeo, Yo La Tengo, Feist, the Stooges, Jarvis Cocker, Kaiser Chiefs, The Boredoms, The Album Leaf....(another 30 Japanese groups

things they don't tell you/being an ALT

2007-05-21T02:08:00.000-07:00

you enter the school, take off your outside shoes and slide them into a little box marked "ALT" and put on your inside shoes, then you go up the stairs to the Teacher's Room which is already full--the teachers came in about 30 minutes or an hour before you and they're all trying to finish their coffee before the daily school meeting at 8:30. the bell rings, you stand up with the rest of the

a visitation from beyond

2007-05-16T02:34:00.000-07:00

( WARNING!!! don't look at the picture. DON'T! it has the F word written on it. you know the word. THAT word. So, unless you're 45 and lonely and unoffended by that magical word...don't look)Enoshima floats off the coast of Fujisawa, attached by a long bridge. The island is home to one of Japan's temples dedicated to a female god and also home to gardens, restaurants, a spa, a lighthouse...

this american life

2007-04-24T01:31:00.000-07:00

http://www.thislife.org/Radio_Episode.aspx?episode=290it's free, it's educational AND it's entertaining?this american lifeepisode 290: Godless America

thoughts on japan, the universe and meaning

2007-04-20T05:22:00.000-07:00

i've been reading Sophie's World, the supposedly children's book that mixes philosophy 101 with a cheesy YET entertaining twist that I won't ruin for you, and thinking about, well, existence.i guess i've been doing that a lot lately--people have been telling me that i "have an old soul," that i am "really mature for [my] age," and things like that...which makes one wonder what an "old soul" is

things i see in Fujisawa

2007-02-14T01:58:00.000-08:00

(from left to right)Eri"Naive Lady" toilet paper? I'm guessing there was a thesauras involved here...Issa Foodium Bar! "quietness--it is the summit of the clouds that can be seen at the bottom of the lake."Enoshima beach, an easy 30 minute walk along the river, is a dirty..dirty beach..and there's a lot of it.. the trash from the summer beach bars still washes ashore today. I saw parts of shoes,

weddings in disneyland

2007-02-09T20:53:00.000-08:00

sitting in my new apartment, trying to clean my windows...which is harder than you might believe, i have to lean out of the right window to clean what i can reach of that window and that's only about half...and then i realize that my windows are going to look rediculous...i have two half-clean windows. it makes an eye--the pupil being the slightly mildewy middle part and the whites or the "

you can never go home again

2007-02-07T23:32:00.000-08:00

these are for you, jennaNancy Drew--Tuscaderoa house is not a home--Luther Vandrosslove,your brother

name dropping is for assholes (but I am a bit of an ass..so..)

2007-01-21T00:03:00.000-08:00

life goes well, it does, but there are parts that soar above and parts that swoop below...this weekend was all far above just "well."on friday night I went to Shibuya to see 2 guys from Belle and Sebastian (Bob and Richard) DJon saturday morning I went to Kamakura to take part in a traditional "i-ai" competitionand saturday night I helped my friend set up his monthly "Push" party

thoughts on sex? oh don't worry if you're over 30..no details

2007-01-18T01:16:00.000-08:00

I'm not REALLY going to talk about sex, but I am going to talk about a MOVIE about sex. Be forewarned.I'm watching Shortbus, the long awaited second feature from that guy who made that musical about the transsexual musician--yes, that guy. I'm not terribly far into it yet, so I cannot really critique or praise it--BUTI wanted to say a few things.1) the use of "Winter Love" by the Animal

the evil giraffe of winter has stolen into my Fujisawa home. AND I take semi-artsy photos a highschool art student would be proud of.

2007-01-04T09:47:00.000-08:00

the politics of the knee touch and free of reprisal..oh god..i can't get the stink of sin from under my nails!

2007-01-03T04:31:00.000-08:00

I had too much to drink a few nights ago. It wasn't a horrible evening as a result--in fact I got 2 emails saying what a GREAT time had been had. 2 being the perfect number as--well--only 2 of the 3 people I went out with had my email address.the only thing leaving me a little..guilty...is a result of a bit of culture..in japan, I had heard, if someone touches your leg it's a sure sign that

sites worth your visit... an emphasis on photography..

2006-12-25T17:22:00.000-08:00

Found Pictures(just that)Perfect Phallus(a certain woman, or perhaps "woman," who has made it her goal to survey the glorious manhood of many..and to leave us with what she considers--the Perfect Phallus. Probably not safe for work, unless you work at a porn store)

a short summary, a wish, and a comment on sanity or something

2006-12-24T04:17:00.000-08:00

In Japan it will be christmas in 3 hours. I wanted to wish you all a merry one in this very impersonal way because, though I do honestly care about 90% of you, I don't have enough time to write something to each and every one of you.I will spend my christmas with the few friends I have who are not: working (it's not a holiday here in Japan), back in their home country, hanging with visiting

winter, loneliness and the tragedy of online personals

2006-12-20T00:18:00.000-08:00

*a forgotten post from December 20th...last year*it is officially winter now, isn't it? or are we waiting for a sign--perhaps a lonely snowflake or at least a bit of lacy frost on the window? all i get, other than closer to my winter vacation, is exhaust when i exhale.i guess there is one other thing i get this time of year--the need. i am one of those people who rarely feels such things--I

fever, clean, Question, backdrops and a glass of wine

2006-12-05T23:53:00.000-08:00

There is a feeling, a strange lingering sense of "being watched," that I remember from my childhood. I can remember laying, feverish, upon the living room couch.It was during my solitary stretch of insomnia--I lay awake all night there in that small room in our small house in Omaha Nebraska and stared at the ceiling. I was a strange child. The thoughts I remember most vividly included, but were

bloated, yo! yogi!,

2006-11-13T03:45:00.000-08:00

my first time to visit the famous (and apparently infamous) yoyogi park was a delight; what is better than something surpassing your expectations? ive meant, for 3 months now, to go but haven't yet made it. yoyogi park, jokes about the name will remain unstated i promise, is a place for music lover, music creators, and the colorful people who love watching both...yoyogi park is located between

things to do in japan--including s&m themed dance parties

2006-10-30T01:11:00.000-08:00

(I will, for sanity and security, leave details out of this entry)at a club called yellow we celebrated Halloween on Saturday(thank goodness there were no yellow fetishes on display though, supposedly, there was a bit of the BROWNEST of fetishes on display in the private show that went on before we arrived..sadly we missed all of that).the whole night was rather strange in that: at about 1, which

writing this on a japanese computer: buttons buttons

2006-10-27T01:46:00.001-07:00

always an interesting experience--using a computer with buttons randomly chucked about. the @ button, for example, lies next to the k and god forbid you want to QUOTE someone...im finally comfortable at my new school--and this is good. if everything goes as it has--i'll be perfectly settled here in another 2 weeks. I'll even be back at my favorite school, so far, in time for my birthday--my gut

out and about

2006-10-11T21:14:00.000-07:00

just a quick post to say that today was so good. we (we being pride student union...the old lgbtsu) celebrated national coming out day... i don't think i've ever seen so many supportive, NICE, and just generally awesome people in one day... it was GOOD. 49 people came to our meeting tonight. it was SO GOOD.we're cute, AND we support equal rights for ALL people

the soundtrack to my life in Japan (in no particular order and without much thought)

2006-10-09T02:11:00.000-07:00

I'm Calling--The Polyphonic Spree (cult Pop)Dead Popstars--Altered Images (80's Pop)Devil Was In My Yard--Sleepy Jackson (Pop)Brand New Wave Upper Ground--Judy and Mary (J-Pop)Yours To Keep--Teddybears Stockholm (cutesy dancy (?))Part Time Love--Gladys Knight and the Pips (Soul/R&B)Cosmic Dancer--T. Rex (60's (?) rock)Perfect Blue Sky (ft. Robert Smith)--Junkie XL (cure + airy clubby pop music=?)

arty farty mixi gay gay gay (doesn't that sound like a cheer?)

2006-10-08T23:42:00.000-07:00

i just wrote my third, entirely Japanese, blog entry on my new mixi profile (the Japanese equivalent of Myspace). be impressed.or something.p.s. i went to a g-g-gay club last night called "arty farty." they played shania twain and people danced.this is officially another world/hell may have frozen over.p.p.s. it was fun and different, but i got 4 hours of sleep today AND I am 100 dollars poorer

in shibuya they have:

2006-10-04T19:30:00.000-07:00

two fools who try on 10 dollar hats--or 3 (hats, not idiots) for 20.be jealous of our madd stylez.

when i stall/sometimes i write weird things

2006-10-01T20:47:00.000-07:00

once upon a time, as incredible as it is to start a story that way in the year 2006, a boy was born (in 1983) and cursed with the inability to commit; given a long history of great half-hearted attempts, a few great fallings-upon-big-lucky-things, and being generally well rounded--he still managed to never really commit to anything. besides, perhaps, his eternal commitment to...being

nigerians teaching matthew about peace

2006-10-01T08:41:00.000-07:00

the doors opened, the white gloved man beckoned, and we streamed onto the last train south.before boarding we'd joked about sitting around someone and speaking through them, we'd laughed about the discomfort they'd feel at our joke, but then I sat next to Ifey and had an actual conversation.She is a refugee from Nigeria--she's been here for 10 years now (about) and she's finally opened up here

brit pop, house, and the words "British women eat too much 'ma-ku-do-na-ru-do'"

2006-09-30T12:23:00.000-07:00

at the corner of something and something we walked up to a gaggle of amazingly coiffed asian men--all posed coquetishely waiting for a stray female (probably)--and asked for directions. Mark, a brit from sheffield whom i just met tonight, began the conversation with a lovely,"excuse me, but do you speak english?"the most outrageous of the three--imagine hot topic punk with a twist of something

3 feet of bollywood joy...and christy's chanting "this is war"

2006-09-25T09:56:00.001-07:00

things to keep you occupied for the next 5 minutes or so:Jesus Camp(documentary about christian camps that emphasize that whole, you know, conversion thing. that and "this is war! this is war!" scary.)Little Superstar(the funniest thing i've seen in months--thanks to Jordanna for the link!)((on the other side of the christian spectrum (read: rainbow) see: Camp Out))

I am, I am on, I am on a

2006-09-18T19:03:00.000-07:00

autopilot, floating, coasting, gliding, lithium rollercoaster, going nowhere fast...things are good enough or not bad enough to warrant a change in any direction; i have so much fun some days/nights but somedays are kind of boring.. in my head this is what i imagine corporate life would be like--you'd KIND OF like your job and the money would be nice and you'd keep going until the day

My "mansion"

2006-09-04T02:58:00.000-07:00

So This is now my apartment. Bask in the glory.I would take the time to arrange them but...I won't.So. Let me just tell you--one is the hallway, one is our library/bathroom, one is our lovely kitchen-see if you can find our "oven," one is my bedroom, one is our "guest room/cool room," one is my clothing rack, and another is our view. oh and i think i threw in a picture of me making that face I

first edition of my "newsletter" or: when matthew has a day off AND he's sick and doesn't to leave the house and be seen by the world.. he stalls

2006-08-27T22:21:00.000-07:00

REDWINE and CONFUCIUS in:JAPANI’ll be here for awhile, get used to it.(The week before…The first 2 weeks)Leaving one’s home is always something, isn’t it?And by “something” I mean: strange, awkward, exciting,scary...almost erotic, really. I would use a metaphor to explain howI feel, but it really isn’t that big of a deal.I can’t remember, now, where I was going with that--but let me beginanew. I

dj pandora

2006-08-22T03:52:00.000-07:00

click on the picture, if you don't mind, and enjoy quite the ingenious...en..ingeniusgoddamnspelling.. THING all right?You name a song/artist, it categorizes the song/artist...with...i dunno, adjectives..genres...and then:it arranges a play list of similar songs. You tell it what you like and dont like and it further refines the process. It is a SMART radiostation. try it out...

yes even gay furries find love

2006-08-21T23:54:00.000-07:00

(not appropriate for work, probably)

haiku, old women, trains and men who burp and it sounds like they might actually be vomiting but you hope not

2006-08-11T05:55:00.001-07:00

my day was sunshine and rainbow sprinkles till i got burpy mcsmells bad next to me at the internet cafe i now call my second home, but with more asian people. that is actually its fully name. second home but with more asian people--actually, i dont know its name cause its in kanji which is that language you people with bad taste just LOVE to get tattoos of.today was my first day at my real job,

Frolicking, which i do not know how to spell but MOST DEFINITELY know how to do, through the internet

2006-07-30T10:47:00.000-07:00

https://addons.mozilla.org/firefox/138/btw, if you use mozilla's lovely firefox program to browse as you should, you need this add on; "stumble" links you to sites you would never find on your own--all based on a few interests you list. it's free, too.the only bad thing about it is, as with channel surfing, it's quite possible to get lost in all of it.i think i'll start posting more...random

Fujisawa-shi, Kanagawa-ken

2006-07-30T10:21:00.000-07:00

Not much to say today, beyond "oh my god I'm leaving for a year..at LEAST...for japan, a place I've never been and whose language I am SOURLY in need of practice of...and..and" AND so I'll leave you with pretty pictures, a few links. <3 Redwineandconfuciushttp://www.cityfujisawa.ne.jp/kankou/english/ht_mido/"For tourists,Fujisawa City is full of attractions and sight sports. Along with its

heroine chic and the bitches who swallowed that horse pill

2006-07-21T01:16:00.000-07:00

nothing is more painful than the pretentious addict; the man who will watch you drink your 2nd glass of wine and sigh, deeply, insisting that you are fouling your very system....before he hides in the bathroom, shooting death into his vein.there is a boy with a needle in his arm in my parents' bathroom; the horse is rampant and i'm am mildly plagued.

have you noticed?

2006-06-13T00:29:00.000-07:00

everyone seems a little self-destructive lately. maybe it's just tallahassee? is it really that boring in the summer here? i don't know. i guess i have those same urges to fuck things up; i see those opportunities and flirt with less-than-intelligent decisions. i've been good at resisting. but it seems like all around, things are falling apart. i'm doing alright, though. case you were

what the fuck??

2006-06-04T11:24:00.000-07:00

as a rule, i generally don't remember my dreams, save a few terrifying and incredibly vivid ones from childhood (which involved a murderer loose in my grandfather's catering office, a ghost town, and a really strange orwellian dream in which there were a lot of dead babies). but last night i had this...unique...and interesting(?) dream. a friend of mine, who used to be quite close, but has since

unforgiveables, repitition, and white bread sundays in whitesville

2006-05-21T10:45:00.000-07:00

sitting with my sister and father across from me, peering out between them at the assorted colorado dregs and my eyes lingered on the worst of the worst: the double date--the first or second date..double date.you see these people sitting about too far apart, playing with their hands, hair or readjusting their genitals. you can also hear their awkward silences punctuated by generic (read: safe)

meditation on self-pleasure

2006-05-03T00:32:00.000-07:00

let me preface this by first saying how happy (honored? relieved?) i am to still be listed as a contributor to such a fine publication as this. who is left, matthew and sunny and i? is that sunny? i don't know; i don't even know sunny. i am sure you are lovely.secondly, as you might have guessed by the title of this post, this will be one of mature subject matter. small children, prudish adults,

The aftermath: gay, hail, and the probability of hell

2006-04-22T22:50:00.000-07:00

The only sin, unforgivable, is to doubt the holy spirit.I knew that today would be special when it started hailing. You see, in Florida it rarely hails. I sat outside of my house, windows fogged, staring out at dime sized bits of ice bouncing off my poor car. It was more than 80 degrees and still the bits of ice fell. What does that say of heaven?I wore a prom dress out tonight--a black dress

from red wine..to....SAKE?

2006-03-24T23:01:00.000-08:00

I just heard that I've been accepted, pending a background check, to teach English in Japan. In Tokyo. Expect big changes in blog topic...quality..etc..I'm going to delete several of the other authors tonight, actually...it seems like time.

thoughts on sex: "lateralization," grace, and "jen-uh-say-qua"

2006-02-26T01:43:00.000-08:00

i am so used to "straight" men hitting on me that i'm only mildly annoyed by it now.i am used to the vague and gratuitous compliments, the lingering touches. it all just spells c-o-n-f-u-s-i-o-n to me.

the poorhouse and what color to paint the walls

2006-01-10T09:38:00.000-08:00

I told a dear friend that I wasn't persuing art of any sort (e.g. written, etc..) because I'd "never been encouraged." I realized about one second later how sad, tragic really, that statement was.I guess I really do look for constant positive reinforcement--or negative reinforcement that is still reinforcing...it's strange. Sometimes I feel like every move I make (to quote the Police) is just

the gay ants that i crush between two fingers and the hopelessness of it all

2006-01-01T12:51:00.000-08:00

i'm going to tell you my dream regardless of its, well, slightly graphic nature.so, you may stop reading now if ants or man-on-man action make/s you sick OR if you are under 18 (god forbid).i guess i'll tell it in first person. that's generally how this dream went anyway.i was suddenly in a hotel room with bryan, a young and tall, and slightly crazy, gay man. the room was vague with tall white

the coming year

2005-12-31T22:41:00.000-08:00

well, i suppose the year came already. unless you're west of here. which you might be.in any case, earlier tonight, i was sitting in the living room with my mother and our dachshund (whose name is heidi, for those of you who are interested in that sort of trivia). we were watching the dick clark new years hootenanny on television. and i realized that i never again want to have one of these

on xmas and things and the fact i'm running out of time and moral high ground

2005-12-15T17:55:00.000-08:00

i really do worry about being overly materialistic. i remember getting in a huge fight with my parents because, well, they were giving my sister money to buy a car. they were giving her said money because she is younger than i am and they wanted to be "fair" (e.g. my parents and i have been putting money away for almost 2 years longer than my sister...so i have more...).i was very angry at them

in the bed or on the table--descartes is for lovers

2005-11-26T14:22:00.000-08:00

In Descartes’ Meditations, he proposes that he is but a “thing” that thinks. That is that is to say that he is this and nothing more – that essentially it is his mind – an elaborate mechanism capable of producing both thoughts and feelings that will govern who he is. That there is a necessary correlation between mind and body, Descartes opposes. Claiming there is no necessary connection between

Tokyo Happy Hour

2005-11-08T22:44:00.001-08:00

I was writing this while hanging out with Matt and Holly at All Saints, so I figure I may as well just post this here. Also, hi, I'm Joe. “Hey.” Someone was fucking shaking me. “Mark, wake up. Wake up, man.” Jamie was fucking shaking me. Goddammit. I struggled up onto one elbow and fixed him with a poisonous eye. “What the fuck,

in search of origins

2005-11-06T23:44:00.000-08:00

is it just me? or does everything begin in november? i have been scanning blogs, been talking to friends--and it seems like everything has a DAY in November. Maybe it's because VALENTINE'S DAY but I still can't quite make sense of it.everything begins in november.wish me a happy birthday on the 14th.BETTER YET--throw me a dance party...somewhere dance-able.or something.OH and...recommend soul

a few drunk thoughts on eating meat

2005-11-05T00:13:00.000-08:00

as i sit here, hiccuping and listening to gwen stefani, i find myself thinking about being vegetarian again. note: earlier i drank most of an enormous bottle of pinot grigio, with a small amount of help from matt... yeah, he's a pussy. it's true; i heard it.i would like to note that tonight was my last night as a carnivore: we ate chicken parmesan, pasta, salad, and bread. a feast! also wine.

a trip to new orleans with more nebulous photos and vanity

2005-11-01T12:58:00.000-08:00

We drove from 4 in the A M till we got to New Orleans and got lost; the streets are half one-way and half no-way. The people at the hotel front desk gave us horrible directions and we drove blindly for 40 minutes before stumbling onto it.In New Orleans we danced, walked around, drank coffee, ate too much, slept too little, bought records and tacky clothing from flea markets and small stores with

scary scary little white girls singing about hate

2005-10-25T14:45:00.000-07:00

here's a little hatred for you---and on myspace too! how does myspace (read FOX) let them keep this up?

today is the first day of the rest of my downward spiral towards old age and senility

2005-10-24T13:38:00.000-07:00

another of the writers, the one who just had amazing sex apparently, and I are going to new orleans this weekend. i am terribly, terribly, inexhaustably excited about it too; the hours of uninterrupted time for us to talk about boys, listen to bad music and generally harangue about THINGS (is that the correct usage?). Several of the bands that I really wanted to see are no longer performing *

sex

2005-10-24T04:30:00.000-07:00

"the best sex I've had in two years."

I'm a tool for you, mr.

2005-10-20T20:52:00.000-07:00

i was going to post my paper on Nietzsche...but Oh my go I'm fucked!! I think I deleted it!!!!!! fuuuuuuuuuuuuu. k... . ... ..c k

New Email Address fyi, kiddoes!

2005-10-11T22:08:00.000-07:00

i was thinking "beckforpresident" but instead got semi-political with americadoesntknow@yahoo.co.uk-- it's funny that i got a uk address because i only said i wanted uk news. who knew?

the ghosts on the titanic sing whilst they sleep with the fish that give you mercury poisoning

2005-10-10T15:50:00.000-07:00

It's been a strange period for me; I've been busy and yet utterly lazy. I spend all day on campus working and then I get absolutely nothing accomplished when i get home. I haven't exercised in a week or two now. I feel absolutely leaden.Things are going well, at least, and I relish each new day of crisping in the sun with holly while handing out flyers to the masses. We've become the

larry bonk !!!

2005-10-05T23:33:00.000-07:00

there are about two million other conversations where this one came from. All o them involve Larry stoned.FizzFit2K: hi? FizzFit2K: what should i do with mnyself A debutante: pot duh FizzFit2K: i already did that!! im getting un stoned anywaysss FizzFit2K: sunny i feel like everoyne thinks ima ditz! A debutante: they may A debutante: so fuck 'em A debutante: it's not like you

for fun (David Russell)

2005-10-04T16:01:00.000-07:00

Towards a new strategy for dealing with ecological problemsLet us apply the "double surrender" strategy used successfully by AA in the context of social ecology.The first step is to admit our powerlessness over environmental pollution. By so doing we are trying to extinguish the roots of the most essential epistemological "error" of mankind- the belief that we are strong enough (god-like) to

conversation with hodge part 2

2005-10-01T19:42:00.000-07:00

[more for thought or not.]A debutante: fuck yesss A debutante: eeww all the merging of identity....i could never copeZarnovich: I just think that much time with someone, is sort of a sign of dependency (like a psychic/social vampire) and they both drain each other to death. I mean, I could utterly love someone, but I don't wan to see them 24/7, and I'd hope they wouldn't want ot see me that

conversation with hodge part 1

2005-10-01T19:34:00.000-07:00

[thought ---my grandmother was married by the time she was 20- pregnant with my mom at 21. there was no such thing as the pill. so she had four kids. she wasn't even sure she wanted four kids -- her husband got a vasectomy after their last. she had wanted to work after college but instead she had four kids. things were different, very different then.]Zarnovich: in reference to the journal

hmm. . . calendars

2005-09-28T11:14:00.000-07:00

This weekend is looking a little more free for me. I might actually be able to post excerpts from the Against Me! interview. . . Everyone get excited!

...please enjoy

2005-09-27T00:51:00.000-07:00

The desperate quest for “happiness” does not discriminate between sex, or age, or race. The struggle to attain happiness is at the core of our many actions, goals, and decisions. We can assume this is true because we assume that any human, when given options, would choose that option that would make him happiest. It is this constant experience of striving to reach happiness that inevitably sets

Some random musical STUFF for your perusal

2005-09-22T11:37:00.000-07:00

I'm posting a few random tunes for you to listen to, or not.These are all songs that I've been listening to today; songs that appeal to me when it's quiet and cloudy as it is today. It's the day for a hurricane and this is the music for those of us sitting in the rainy shadows far from it.The first song is almost a spiritual, a hymnal of sorts to a woman that just can't seem to FORGIVE and

bleh

2005-09-20T18:17:00.000-07:00

sick to my stomach from eating SO much low carb chocolate. being on the low card diet can be hard at times. Have insights on Bertrand Russell's conquest of happiness and musings of other things I've been reading. they'll be posted within the nest twenty four hours i imagine.

flick flick flicker, and go..............

2005-09-16T23:31:00.000-07:00

I retreated in dissapointment to my car that was parked in staff parking to smoke a cigarette and listen to tom waits on the way home. I felt a bit of ecstacy. I felt very close to my surroundings. Threatened at the gas station, and admiring of the city in which I live. The road constructions, never quite done here, are we? the meddling men with no where to go, the diurnal downtown streets, the

A MUSIC POST?

2005-09-06T16:11:00.000-07:00

http://s47.yousendit.com/d.aspx?id=0UXYUBK4Q3DVQ3W0F0BMSGVTWDTHIS IS A TEST!Here's some lovely quirky british folk rock from the late sixties!Go and buy the record:http://www.nulime.com/p43871/cat287/Music/Folk/Pentangle-CD.htmlor HERE:http://www.cduniverse.com/productinfo.asp?PID=6736186&style=music&frm=frooglemusic(AND..imagine that there's lots of provisional STUFF here..about not stealing

clouds of vomitus and red wine

2005-09-05T19:36:00.000-07:00

I guess this entry makes perfect sense, given the title of this blog.I was drunk last night. I would say "it hit me," but I can't even say that--I don't remember anything past getting more drinks, dropping a beer on some girl's foot after her boyfriend/gay best friend bumped into me/had the indecency to stand in my path, and then dancing with candice and kelsey and trying to get them to kiss:"no

Myspace: Friend or Foe? and Our Bodies Underneath

2005-09-02T10:34:00.000-07:00

http://mail.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=mail.readmessage&messageID=59602046&type=inbox&status=new&Mytoken=20050902103147Goddd...myspace is really wonderful, isn't it? It offers us so much: we stay in contact with those we want to, we have involuntary contact with those we'd rather not --- AND if we're lucky, we just might meet those who share similar interests and (shh) lifestyle choices.

2005-08-24T01:41:00.000-07:00

strange to think that kelsey and i were at "goth" night just an hour ago; we danced to the worstthis side of the macarena. i'd post more..but i can't figure this out.so here's all you get. enjoy and beg me for more--maybe i'll indulge.good night.

2005-08-22T21:51:00.000-07:00

I must* update about the weekend...tomorrow. Simply too tired right now.

2005-08-22T09:40:00.000-07:00

it really would be wonderful if laundry washed itself and bug bites didn't itch.

a glance forward and downward

2005-08-21T09:33:00.000-07:00

we are disgustingly LAX, it could be said, because of our total disregard for this site and our two loyal readers. to both of you--i am sincerely sorry.to the people who won't read this--F*** YOU.I went used car shopping and I was in hell.Every single stop was worse than the last; we started off at the BIG ones: Toyota, Honda, etc.. and then we moved down to the independent dealerships with

2005-08-10T20:54:00.000-07:00

She said "We danced like fireflies"As she flicked her flashlight on"But they'll never put us in a jar."And quickly turned it off

an addition to my last post:

2005-08-10T11:30:00.000-07:00

I started reading What's the Matter With Kansas? today and in one section there was a paragraph that went along perfectly with something I was talking about in my last post, so I thought I would add it."There were so many closed shops in Wichita when I visited in 2003 that you could drive for blocks without ever leaving their empty parking lots, running parallel to the city streets past the

2005-08-08T15:30:00.001-07:00

"The kids who spray graffiti all over the subway cars at night have learned how to recycle city space very well."I sit here drinking Heineken and reading The Philosophy of Andy Warhol, wanting to be or at least be friends with him. It makes me feel like I don't get anything done, reading about how he cranks out 500 paintings in a month and loving leftovers. He used everything, things that

2005-08-07T12:02:00.000-07:00

I have nothing better to do than update this again--this time just because I RE-discovered one of my favorite photos from last year's halloween. THIS year--we're going to Voodoo Fest--anyone wanna get us media passes? hmm?Anyone wanna camp with us?

pooing, national public radio, and LEGS

2005-08-07T11:50:00.000-07:00

I watch tv late at night; there's something intoxicating about it.I can turn on almost any channel and see something so awful that that wouldn't show it any other time. I love it.Last night I heard a man say "it's the next best things since" and I cringed, "legs."He was, of course, refering to his Hoveround chair. APPARENTLY--it works well.I wanted to cry--but instead I laughed and patted my

2005-07-26T19:07:00.000-07:00

Earlier I read some old entries of someone's about a mouse named Philip that lived in their house. I was reminded of when I was a kid and read all of the Mouse and the Motorcycle books. I wanted a pet mouse so bad. When I read about Philip, I felt a little jealous.I've been wanting to be a kid again so much lately I can hardly stand it. Everyone wants to grow up and be done with school, and I

exquisite corpses

2005-07-24T21:55:00.000-07:00

apparently loads of people are struck by lightning in colorado---perhaps because of the altitude, perhaps because of all of the stupid people. both seem equally likely to me.i thought that, tonight, as i walked. it was dripping, slightly, and i worried my leather coat would be ruined--but I forgot that when i heard the first crack of thunder. do you remember when you were little--thinking

questions are for JERKS

2005-07-24T01:59:00.001-07:00

do me a favor and look at my "wish list"--the one in my profile--and tell me what you think?what does it tell you about me?BESIDES--shallow and stupid.I'm interested.AND then comment.

2005-07-20T20:39:00.001-07:00

i like dancing to crazy musicwith doors closedfeel the blooddancing under the safety of skinjust likemy dislike of proper punctuation

NLP's freshest

2005-07-16T14:20:00.000-07:00

My sister wakes me up (after three hours of sleep) to tell me that she's slept through physics and needs me to call to excuse her. So a very sleep-deprived me stumbles down the stairs. I call her school to let them know that she's had a re-occurrence of an ear infection and will not be coming to school today - hopefully with the antibiotics and painkillers she will be ok by Monday, I say. Oh yeah

sad sad whine whine....well not TONIGHT

2005-07-12T22:26:00.000-07:00

AND NOW FOR WEIRD THINGS TO CLICK ON COURTESY OF:defamer.com.JUICE AND ASS NEVER TASTED BETTER:http://3xi.org/views/public/?doc=LapjuicerI only like unicorns when they're licking my poo hole. *NOTICE: this site is intended for viewers over the age of 18 and redwineandconfucius HATES it when unicorns lick his poo hole*http://www.worlddreambank.org/U/UNICORGY.HTMahem...that is all for now.(actually

double-deckered... dreams?

2005-07-12T15:34:00.000-07:00

So sorry about my neglegance, boys, It's been a pretty draining week. Aside from generally lesser health, I've been pretty unhappy about being back (from London). It was a month on July 8th that I've been stateside and I suppose the actualism of being back hadn't hit me - I had done everything within my power to distract myself from being home. I had purchased several cds - some of which I don't

there's a line of beauty

2005-07-11T19:13:00.000-07:00

there's a search for Truth and Meaning in a lot of people these days---I say "these" because the search is a little different today than it was in the days before the internet. now people can type in truth, with a capital t, and find a million different answers.people still seem to prefer the old ways though; the ways of faith or of antifaith. nowhere is this search clearer than at work: women